This is Management 101, but I fear young Christian men and well-intentioned Christian parents of daughters have gotten a little fuzzy on the concept.I often think that if we scrutinized our parenting with the same intensity we plan to turn on our daughters’ prospective suitors, we’d stop speculating about shotguns and applications and start building that wall. Kneel at a pink chenille bedside and pray your guts out. Resolve to settle for nothing less than the best protection for your daughter.I never would have considered dating a non-Christian. In fact, “loves God and puts Him first” was always on the top of the list of what I was looking for. It started as impatience, but it soon developed into a rampaging beast of unbelief, doubt, and worst of all, hopelessness.It felt like everyone I knew was married, including the kids I used to babysit.
The moment I made the decision to waver on something I always said I would never compromise on, the offers flooded in. He had a great career and he truly could give me everything I ever wanted in this life. I knew he wasn’t a believer, but I wanted to spend time with him and get to know more about him. But the reality is, more often than not, they are great. But when 30 hit, let’s just say God and me were in a fight. You go to youth group, you love Jesus, you meet someone, you graduate high school, you get married, and as the fairy tales say, “You live happily ever after.” When I was 19 I was ready. At 27, I understood and accepted that God was using the last few years to prepare me for marriage.But more than that, relationships can distract you from God. I know that I’ve written it before, but unless you’re looking for marriage, you probably shouldn’t be looking for love! She does not need the belated braggadocio of your intentions to protect her from slouchy-pants fools when she’s a teen. She needs you to hitch up your own and invest in her character—now. Pick up your Indian Princess guide book, or your coach’s clipboard. But here’s a hard reality: if you raise that daughter, she’ll likely intimidate her fair share of “nice Christian boys” as well. The unsuitable suitor finds nothing more terrifying than a woman who knows her worth to God and to her family. Growing up in the church, I thought I had a solid understanding of how my story would play out. No matter how you choose to word it, being single was never in my plans.