I have been dating a wonderful man for about four months now.We’ve known each other almost 20 years prior to dating, and the transition to an amorous relationship was easy and natural.(Red Flags, we like to call them.) As we navigate “dating” again, we quickly realise the rules are very different.Our experience gives us some distinct advantages in terms of recognising what we don’t want.I have learned so much about what it means to be in a giving relationship in these four months, and he has been such a remarkable teacher of that. I think it’s always instructive for women to hear from other women that, despite all the frustrations you’ve had with dating and relationships prior to today, you don’t believe that “men” are the problem, and that, in fact, in this one instance, your boyfriend’s ex-wife was the weak link.
However, I want a serious relationship that is continuously growing.
Thank you for all of your clear and concise thoughts over the last few years.
I have definitely taken things to heart: look for boyfriend behavior; there is a natural timeline where commitment should come by month three, “I love you” around 6 months, living together at 18, engaged at 2-3 years; men do what they want, and so many other pearls.
We talk daily (if he has his son it’s usually by text, otherwise we chat by phone in the evenings), he makes it a point to see me once a week and we always have so much fun together.
When we are together things are easy and fun, just as they should be!