If the relationship is outpacing knowledge of character, reputation, and knowledge of godliness, then that is way too quick.
But if you are in a context in which you have watched the person’s godliness, you have marveled at their character, you have rejoiced in what God has done in them and through them, then speed isn’t a big factor. What drove the speed wasn’t a flare-up of emotions — it wasn’t a fear of loneliness, or desperation, like maybe this is my only shot. Rather, there was knowledge of his faithfulness to God, his desire to serve the Lord, and his seriousness about the things of God.
I am going to be real cautious about saying there is such a thing as “too fast.” What I would rather ask is this: What’s driving the speed?
If mere physical attraction or some kind of emotive, frilly, this-is-the-one weirdness is driving the speed, then, yes.
Now practically speaking, this means singles are seeking out people to speak into their lives.
What can members of local churches practically do to help godly marriages happen, instead of just telling men, “Man up and get your life together,” and telling women, “Stop waiting around and be active in your singleness?
” What role should the church community play in deciding who and when to marry?
Any advice for inviting others into a relationship to that end? But I think what we want to do is work really hard in our churches to create a culture of discipleship.
I love this question because I’m such a big believer in what God has called the covenant community of his people to be in a local context. In this culture, the norm, the air we breathe, is that older men are serious about seeking out younger men to train them; not just train them in the Bible, but really train them in what it looks like to apply the Scriptures to their lives.