He can't keep a job, he doesn't own or rent, he now lives with a cousin, he doesn't have any money, he continues to lie to her.. He can be charming but come on, you need more than a heart, you need a brain too - remember the wizard of Oz?
I throw a bit of humor in there, but truly, this situation has really taken its toll on me. I encouraged her to start counseling, which she has begun. I dated my highschool sweetheart from my Soph year in highschool until my soph year in college.
Especially at her age, she will have to choose her life choices. Hi C., Unfortunately there are two things we don't bank on when we are raising our beautiful children. If this is her direction, she will need your love as always and your support.....in her career choices and her mate. I don't know if you two are Oprah fans, but Oprah's latest book is suppose to be a real life changer! This book could really help your daughter find her true purpose and gain some confidence in her self and find out that she doesn't need to be with losers to feel better. SS Has she asked the question, "Am I dating to date, or dating for marriage? Keep it up no matter how tuff it may be at times Hi, I think you have to be really careful, delicate and back off a bit.
We as moms can influence our kids by example and loving advice. 1.) that they rarely turn out the way we thought they would and 2.) we may not be happy with their choice of mates. Once we realize that they are who they are and not much different than they ever were we can continue to love them unconditionally as who they turned out to be. I know you will be there for her...I know you think she is a very bright and competent person. So let's think about what would happen if we stood back and let her make her own decisions and just took on the roll of supporter instead of life coach. Maybe you both can sign up for her live work shop thats starting on Monday night on the internet. " I am so thrilled that you have a close relationship with her. This boy whom she is dating sounds like someone she should run away FROM as fast as her legs can carry her. I'd also suggest to her that she take a break from this guy to gain a little perspective. Went through the same thing as you daughter only I was a bit younger. She is in counselling and you are praying so those seem to be great steps in the right direction.
If he really loved her, he would not do those things. -Steph [email protected]____Some of our 8 children have stuggled with this problem in the past.
Maybe taking a break would be good, no phone calls nothing. I also help woman like this, or their concerned parents, through the work I do.
It is so freeing to them to learn to deal with the fears on their own level and to give responsibility back to the person who they wanted to change. Knowing your fears can be a important part for her to figure out this problem. If you do it for her she can not learn what she needs to learn.
Counseling is a good thing if you have the right counselor.
Then she might find a guy who also knows how to make his own good decisions.
For someone not in my inner circle to see all the red flags.
So I did it, I broke it off with him, it was not pretty but I did it.
I now have a daughter and hope to God she does not do what I did. I've been a person who always was in a relationship. I think it's because I grew up in a single parent family, my parents divorced when I was young and my father died at an early age. And how does it make her feel when he lies/cheats, etc?
How can she give so much love to someone that does that to her?